Dolly and Carl

A tribute to Love

While spreading Love last week I learned that Dolly lost her great love, Carl Dean. They met at a laundry mat her first day in Nashville. Dolly recalled their chance encounter, saying, "I was surprised and delighted that while he talked to me, he looked at my face (a rare thing for me). He seemed to be genuinely interested in finding out who I was and what I was about." Carl was smitten too and said he immediately fell in love claiming, “I’m going to marry that girl.” Dolly took him home to meet her large family and two years later they wed on May 30, 1966 in Ringgold, GA.

I never knew until I started researching their love story that they chose to make it official in Ringgold. My mother’s best friend since kindergarten was from there and I grew up visiting that precious town and exploring the tall timbers of those hills as a child. Dolly is the soundtrack of my life. I could write an entire book of all the things she taught me. Through it all she always finds a way to bring it back to her faith in God and doing what is right. I feel that God gave her Carl that first day in Nashville while washing clothes to have someone watch over her and keep things clean as the music industry can be very dirty.

It was Carl that kept her going all these years her safe place, her rock. It is not lost on me that Carl actually dealt in rocks a an asphalt paver. He literally laid rock paving country roads to connect people to trade and commerce. Their love is full of so many metaphors, a road less traveled bringing the greatest reward.

He was also her inspiration. The song Jolene is actually about his bank teller. Dolly has joked that Carl used to spend a lot of time at the bank. "The bank teller got this terrible crush on my husband," Parton said. "And he just loved going to the bank because she paid him so much attention. It was kinda like a running joke between us.” when I was saying, 'Hell, you're spending a lot of time at the bank. I don't believe we've got that kind of money.' So it's really an innocent song all around, but sounds like a dreadful one." Looking at old photo’s of Carl, a tall and handsome man, it is easy to see why she would want him to stay in the shadows. Hidden far from any Jolene’s that might be on the tour route but it was Carl who chose to stay in the background and support her career. Another testament to the kind of man he was letting her have the spotlight and being there for her everyday so she could shine.

That love and support is really endearing to me. I think I have had some relationship troubles because the men I am attracted to want me to play the supporting role. Whenever it was my time to shine they would somehow became jealous and resentful and it eventually torn us apart.

Every time I felt a boy was holding me back I would talk to my father about it and he would say, “run child run.” Not really from them but for me to follow my dreams and not get hung up on some boy who did not have the same big imagination. I have been very lucky these last 5 years to have found my Carl Dean. He’s tall and handsome and has no interest in my public pursuits. He doesn’t lay asphalt but has certainly become my rock and safe place. Last summer I thought I was going to have to lock him up when Man In Finance came out. He fit the exact description of what every girl is looking for, only taller.

We most likely won’t get a 60 year love story because we met too late. Making what Dolly and Carl had so precious and rare. In true Dolly fashion her tribute post to him reflected her faith. “He is in God’s arms now and I am okay with that. I will always love you.” -Dolly

If I do make it to 100 and we get 60 years together it will because of the MAHA Movement getting us all healthy. Dolly never talked politics and the only time I’ve ever seen her get fussy in an interview is when she was pushed on who she voted for. "I don't do politics. I have too many fans on both sides of the fence. Of course, I have my opinion, but I learned years ago to keep my mouth shut about things." She was also constantly being wrangled into the feminist movement and her replay about whether she considers herself a feminist is exactly how I feel. "I mean, I must be if being a feminist means I'm all for women, yes! But I don't feel I have to march, hold up a sign or label myself. I think the way I have conducted my life and my business and myself speaks for itself. I don't think of it as being feminist. It's not a label I have to put on myself. I'm just all for gals."

This current climate of labels I find very tiresome. I want to think it has something to do with social media - hashtags for self worth or worse to help find an angry mob to join. That hostility is actually what brought me to Substack. I found I could no longer properly express myself in hashtags. A photo of me in a red hat reading Fake News infuriated my followers to the point of death threats. I am simply searching for the truth and a lot of fake news has gotten in the way.

Trump addressed the nation last week as well and we watched for our hotel room. His run down of social security fraud showcased the fact that people 120 years old were still receiving benefits. He then made a joke to Bobby, “Our country is a lot healthier than we thought.” Seeing Secretary Kennedy light up with a smile gave me chills. He/we worked so hard for him to be in that room and to make a difference. Even though it is sad the abuse of power from financial programs designed to help people there is still room to laugh and time to make things right.

I watched the Presidential address with friends from all walks of life and political beliefs. We were working the Natural Food Expo West and our common thread was health and wellness. My dear friend Leslie Scofield launched her Love Electrolyte water at the expo and asked me to a part of her team. I was honored as I know her track record of bringing together the most brilliant entrepreneurs. There will be much more about this mystical H2O coming soon. For now, here are a few photos from the Expo and from the launch party where Diplo brought the vibes! He even donned a Make America Healthy Again hat and I was blown away by his public support and love. I hope to work with him again soon.

I want to leave you with some lyrics of the song Dolly released for Carl: “I wouldn’t be here if you hadn’t been there/ Holding my hand/ Showing you care/ You made me dream more than I dared/ And I wouldn’t be here if you hadn’t been there.” These words are not just for a great love but also a great friend. I hope you all have a Carl in your life, a buddy who makes you dream bigger and gives you the courage to take more chances. Love and light to you all.